Emily, or how I grew to love my twin
by Sam Pembroke
Summary: Basically this is a rewrite of Emily and Rose. The two girls grow together after that June day.
1. Emily Arrives

CHAPTER ONE

EMILY ARRIVES

"Rose! Where have you been? I've been worried sick about you!" my mother called out to me from the front stoop. I climbed the stairs to the stoop and she took me by the wrist.

"Rose Elizabeth Bukater, why didn't you tell any of us that you were going across the street to the park; especially by yourself?" Mother asked with a stern look in her eyes.

I wanted to think of an answer but I could find none. Despite being twelve years old, sometimes mother treated me like I was a baby. I guess to her, I still was. She led me to my room and closed the door, hopefully, keeping my little sister out. She sat me upon the bed.

"Rose, what if something happened to you? Do you KNOW the pain I would suffer from it? Of course you don't, you're still young and carefree."

I hated it when she did this. She never slapped me across the face and she never would lock me into my room, especially with Elizabeth around. Elizabeth is my little sister. She sometimes acts strange, and on certain days she says nothing at all. Today however, Elizabeth was all talk. She is a borderline ten year- old. I was two years old when she was born, we had just moved here from Philadelphia, or so I'm told. Mother doesn't like talking about what we did before we moved here. I think mother and papa have a secret, but don't dare tell me.

"Rose, I have no choice but to tell your father. Think about what you have done. You are being punished, so no reading, talking with Elizabeth, or writing. Lie on your bed and think about what you have done." Mother said as she closed the door to the room.

Mother, I love her and sometimes need her; but she can be a real pain. When I would come home for the weekend during the school term, she would nearly hang onto me for dear life; always asking me if I was all right and if the other girls were teasing me. I would always tell her "no" about the teasing, since I'm good at making friends. About two hours later I heard a familiar voice downstairs: papa. Papa is a very important man, or so I'm told. He's the admiral of our republic's navy. He commands fleets of ships and can send them anywhere in the world. I suspect papa doesn't really love mother, as I sometimes hear them quarrel at night when they go to bed. When he's away and I get scared, I sleep next to mother. I suddenly heard mother in the hallway.

"Samuel, she went across the street into the park by herself. She needs to learn that she just cannot go across the street whenever she feels like it. She must alert us or take Sadie with her."

Miss Sadie is our nanny and governess. She helps get Elizabeth and I dressed in the morning, and ready for bed at night. Miss Sadie has a lot of love in her heart. She comes from a rather industrious town north of the city called Chelsea. She's told us that her family established the city of Malden and is quite wealthy. She could have it all, but she told her parents that she'd rather work for her wealth. She's been with us since I can remember. Today however, she was more than happy. I think Miss Sadie loves us very greatly, for she always hugs and kisses us whenever mother and papa are away. I continued to lie on the bed waiting for papa to enter. I finally heard the door open and in he came.

He did not look angry, just tired. He sat on my bed and put his hand on my head and rubbed my hair.

"Rose, when you do go out, please let one of us know. If something were to happen to you, your mother and I would absolutely be devastated. I'm not angry at you Rose. Just remember next time all right?" He got up and kissed me on the forehead. Mother entered the room after he left. She wanted to tell me something very important.

"Rose, there is somebody your age coming to stay with us. She will arrive here tomorrow afternoon. I want you to be a good girl and be nice to her. I would like you to introduce her to your friends." Mother said.

Great, I wondered about the room that's across the hall from us. I looked inside and there were boxes of things. The bed had been made and a rather nice coverlet covered the bed. The walls had been painted a dark blue, and white drapes adorned the windows. Emily must be sleeping in here.

Mother changed me into a dinner frock and tied my pinafore in the back. I always wondered why I had to wear a pinafore. I am twelve years old, much too old for one. Elizabeth on the other hand needs one, as she is a very messy eater. Tonight is a special night however: we get to eat with mother and papa. Normally they have adult conversations that don't concern little girls. I wanted to make them proud.

Miss Sadie led both Elizabeth and I downstairs to the dining room. The food was already served. Roast beef, one of my favorites was the main meal. Papa began to speak.

"Children, as mother told you; we will be receiving a guest to-morrow. Her name is Emily. Emily Langdon. You will treat her with kindness. You will respect her. She is eager to learn about our family." Papa said.

"Papa, whewe is Emily fwom, is it England?" asked Elizabeth, as usual having trouble with her "R's"

"No, no darling pet. She is from Brattleboro, Vermont." Papa replied. Elizabeth looked down at her plate. I could tell she was tired, but she didn't want to miss the meal.

"Mama, May I be excused?" asked Elizabeth. Mother nodded yes, and Sadie came to collect the mite. Elizabeth kissed mother on the cheek as she walked away.

"Rose dear I would advise you to be nice to Emily. She has a lot more in common with you than you think. I know how you can get Rose. Please just be nice to her." Mother said in a low voice. Why did mother think I was going to be naughty? True, I _can_ be naughty, but I'm also good. The last time I was naughty, was at school. I talked in the middle of class and Ms. Arkwright sent me to Ms. Allen's study, where she gave me ten strokes of the rod. She then told mother about it, and mother sent me to my room the Friday afternoon I arrived home. Sometimes I think mother likes to send me to my room for the fun of it. I bet this Emily is perfect in every way, flawless. She'll probably rub it into my face.

After dinner was over, Miss Sadie came to collect me for bed. I hoped mother would come tuck me in for the night. She made getting to sleep so much easier. Up into the nursery we went. Miss Sadie closed the door. She untied my pinafore, and unbuttoned the back of my frock, pulling it over my head. I unbuttoned my camisole. Miss Sadie then handed me my night dress, which I pulled over my head. After this, I was led to my vanity, where Miss Sadie braided my russet curls.

"You're being a very good girl Rose, better than last night's fussy mess." Miss Sadie said. I looked in the mirror and waited for mother to come in and tuck me into bed. Elizabeth was fast asleep, clutching Melanie her doll. She snored lightly, and twisted in her deep sleep. I climbed into bed, and Sadie said she'd go get mother. I didn't expect papa to come up, for he would probably be at some gentleman's club. I heard the footsteps out in the hall, the door opened and in stepped mother.

"You're in bed and that is good. You were very good tonight Rose. I like it very much when you behave." Mother said as she pulled the coverlet over me. I looked into her eyes and felt at ease. I felt a kiss on my forehead and the lights shut off. Mother always kept to her word that she would tuck us in.

"_Would Emily have to get tucked in too?"_

"_Is Emily a prig?"_

"_Most of all, is she caring of others and does she have friends?"_

All these thoughts were in my head. If Emily took my spot as eldest child, I daresay I'd become very jealous. Sleep overcame me at this point, and luckily Emily was not part of it.

I awoke to find it raining outside. I hated it when it rained, because I'd have to be stuck with Elizabeth.

"Oh Wose, it's waining outside. We can't go play in the pawk to-day. Mama will be so fussy! She'll say 'Elizabeth you need to go to the school-womb or the nuwsewy' although she does spend two hours with me: Aftuh bweakfast, and wight before my nap." Elizabeth droned.

Despite turning ten in a day, Elizabeth still has to have her daily nap. It's an hour after lunch, and lasts until tea time. I'm not allowed to go into the room when she's napping, because mother says I'll disturb Elizabeth. Mother says that if I need to lie down, I may use the sick room to do so. Again, this all may be thrown to the wall if Emily spoils everything. I just know she will. Breakfast consisted of Johnny cakes with jam and butter. I do fancy Johnny cakes, and I could eat a whole griddles worth of them. We ate in the school-room. I drank tea, but Elizabeth drank milk. "Tea's bad for you." She told me. I laughed at her and she turned away. I can be _quite_ priggish to Elizabeth.

"Do you think Emily will be nice to me Elizabeth?" I asked her.

"Don't know." She said her mouth full of Johnny cake.

I will begin to describe Elizabeth's eccentricities to you. Elizabeth is often fraught to "wringing" her hands when certain things happen. When she looks at you, she doesn't make direct eye contact. She doesn't like the way some frocks feel on her. I doubt she will ever wear a corset; she doesn't like things surrounding her in strange ways. Elizabeth is also a bit eccentric when it comes to her interests; she really likes school girl fiction and other stories similar to that. She also wets the bed and herself on a daily basis. I didn't think diapers could be made for a ten year-old, but it's true. They do make them. They are called "youth diapers" I think it was very mean for me to say that last part. Mother entered the school room.

"Elizabeth, shall we play a game?" asked mother.

"Oh yes! I'd love that very much. Can Rose play with us?" Elizabeth had asked with pleading eyes.

"Rose needs to go fix her top drawer. Miss Sadie looked inside and was frightened. Shall we play Bagatelle?"

How typical. They don't want me around. I don't know what they do when they're together. I've heard that Elizabeth is going to have her mind and IQ tested by a Dr. John Langdon at some institute near our grandparents' home. Could this doctor be Emily's father? I've heard that he was mean from other people. Maybe he mistreats Emily and neglects her. If that is the case, then I will try to be the nicest person to her. When she cries, I will come running to her to try to cheer her up. She would be arriving a little after 1:30 this afternoon. I decided to look into her room. There were dolls, and other things. On her bed lay a lacy frock, with an equally lacy pinafore.

"_This girl is practically royalty!"_ I thought to myself. "I mean just LOOK at her dresses! They all look like they cost a lot. Emily had better not be a spoiled brat." I sat on the bed and continued to look around. I looked out the window and saw a good friend of mine down on the sidewalk. "I hope Allison will want to meet Emily. Allison's a pretty tough customer, so it'll be difficult." I then saw her walk up the front walk. She lives next door to us. I do hope she can come over for tea. I walked downstairs and heard the doorbell ring. Becky, our head servant opened the door.

"Is Rose in?" asked Allison.

"Yes Miss Coburn, Miss Rose is in. Here she is now." Becky said.

"Rose, do you want to go to the park today?" Allison asked me.

"Let me go ask mother if it's all right for me to go." I replied.

I went to go find mother. I found her in our room with Elizabeth.

"Mother, may I go to the park with Allison?" I asked her. I hope she said yes.

"Yes you may, but remember Emily is coming in at 1:30. It is now 10:30. Do you have any pocket money?" I nodded and she spoke more.

"I want you to wear your straw hat. DO be careful, it's bad enough we live on such a busy street. You know how those drivers can be." She said. I turned around and walked down the stairs. Allison was waiting for me in the foyer.

Allison Coburn, she'd been my friend since I was five years old. She has black hair and brown eyes, and yes she even has the same issue as Elizabeth. She lived with her parents Alicia and Daniel. Mrs. Coburn was a very kind and caring woman. Mr. Coburn however, was stern. He loved Allison, and wished she would concentrate harder on her studies. We walked across the street into the park. The rain had let up into a slight drizzle.

"Allison, there's something I have to tell you." I said as we sat down on a damp bench. I could feel the seat of my frock getting damp. I hoped my underclothes wouldn't get wet too.

"What do you want to tell me, is it a secret?" Allison asked.

"There's a girl coming to stay with us. Here before that person walks by, surely he'll hear us." I said in a whisper. The person passed. He looked to be a business man. He had a Tavington cigarette between his lips. Allison leaned in close.

"Her name is Emily. She might be mean and nasty, but I don't know. Could you go into this with me? Mother says she should be introduced to my friends. Can you help me with this?" I asked her. She nodded. With this, we both got up from the bench. We decided to walk to a confectioners shop on 8th Avenue. The rain became a little more intense, but our hats shielded our heads. We entered and the smell of the sugar hit us.

"What do you think about getting?" Allison Asked.

"I want milk chocolate, something that has almonds in it." I said. I really did like candy. Elizabeth and I would often go, accompanied by Miss Sadie when we were younger and by younger I mean when I was eight and she was six. We bought all of our candy and walked out the door.

"Do you still have any pocket money Rose?" Allison asked.

"Yes, I have about eight dollars left." I replied.

"Wow, you're a miser!" Allison laughed.

"Take that back, you!" I replied, laughing.

We crossed the street and headed back into the park to eat the candy. We sat on the same bench that we had occupied previous. The trees protected us from the rain. I ate a Valomilk, which is this chocolate that covers a flowing marshmallow center. It was messy, but I wiped my face with the bottom of my frock. Mother would have died if she'd seen me do it. Allison of course saw my underthings.

"You need a new petticoat; the lace edge is coming off." Allison said. I blushed.

"That's not a petticoat, that's my slip." I replied. We let the topic drop, but Allison brought up a valid point.

"When are you going to start wearing a corset? My mother wears one of those things. They look painful." Allison said. I nodded in agreement.

"I agree, but mother wants me to start training, especially for school this fall. I wonder if Emily wears one. She probably does." I said.

We didn't realize how much time had elapsed. We walked across the street to our homes. The rain was really coming down now and my frock was starting to get very wet. I opened the door and walked inside.

"Heavens Rose, you look soaked to the bone. Do be quiet when you go upstairs, Elizabeth is taking her nap. If you'd like to rest, do so in the room closest to ours." Mother said.

"You mean the sick room?" I asked, giving her a puzzled look.

"Yes Rose, the sick room. I want you to rest up. Emily is due any minute and I would like to speak to her…alone." Mother said in a flat, calm voice.

So mother wanted to speak to Emily alone. That could mean several things. One, it could mean that mother is truly being a great hostess. Two, she could be telling Emily that if she attacks Elizabeth or I; she'll strike back. Three, it could mean that she wants to give Emily a tour of the house. Whatever reason, I still found it odd.

I made my way to the sick room. I stripped down to my slip and crawled beneath the sheets of the bed. The blanket was of thick wool and it was scratchy. I lay looking at the ceiling. It was funny how the plaster made different patterns. Something was scratching my head: my hair bow. I took it off and put it on the bedside table. Suddenly I heard the door open. It was mother.

"I brought you this to sleep in. I think it would be more comfortable than your underwear." She said. I couldn't tell if she was being serious or being funny. She handed me the nightdress.

"Here, I'll slide it on over my slip." I said. Mother looked at me and said

"That's my girl." She walked over to the bed and kissed me as well as stroked my hair.

"I love you mother." I said.

"I love you too Rose. You just rest your eyes and when you wake up; make sure you get Miss Sadie. Emily should be here by then, and I'd like you to meet her." She said.

I drifted off to a light sleep. I had no ideas of the goings on downstairs.

I woke up and called for Miss Sadie. She did not come. I got up and put my robe on. I walked down the hall. I heard voices coming from the room that was to be occupied by Emily.

"Mummy, I want to go home. Why did mama send me here?" The voice asked.

Who was this girl calling my mother mummy? Certainly she was not a child of hers. She was not my sister. I stayed outside the door. I continued to listen.

"Emily, it was very nice of your mother to send you here. I haven't seen you in years. You'll love Rose and Elizabeth. They're nice girls. I know you're nice. Your mother didn't just send you here for the sake of getting rid of you; she wants you to go to Miss Allen's school." My mother said.

I wanted to open the door, but the person inside needed privacy. I then heard crying.

She was homesick. I felt bad for her. I really did. I decided to open the door and go in.

"Ah, Rose. I see that you are up from your rest. This is Emily." Mother said.

The girl looked just like if I had looked into the mirror and saw a reflection.

"Mother, is Emily my sister?" I asked. I heard her swallow hard.

"Rose, sit down." I heard her say. I did just that, actually I planted myself there.

"Rose, Emily. When you were born, something happened. I had a friend who I had gone to school with. I had asked her to take the other child. She had been so happy. She now had a baby to call her own, and here she is. She's here with her family." Mother said. Emily's tears grew in size. Mother put a comforting hand on Emily's shoulder.

"Shhh Emily, it's okay. I'm here for you. We're all here for you. It's going to take time sweetheart, but I know you can do it. We're a very nice family." Mother said in a gentle tone.

I wanted to say something to this girl. I really did. Finally, I got the gumption to say something.

"Emily, we really are a nice family. Mother is the best. She loves both Elizabeth and I to death. We won't hurt you. Please hear me out." I said in the gentlest tone I could muster.

"Okay. I'll try to hear you out." Emily said in a shaky voice. She extended her arms out to embrace. We embraced.

"Rose, why don't you go and get dressed? Dinner will be served downstairs tonight." Mother said. I asked Miss Sadie if she would help me. She said that she would. We walked to the nursery and she helped me with a frock selection.


	2. Dinner With Emily

CHAPTER TWO

DINNER WITH EMILY

AND

THE TRAIN

After Sadie got me dressed into my dinner frock, I sat at my desk. I wrote in my diary about Emily. I truly felt sorry for her; for we were her true family and that everything that she had known was not the truth. I heard the door open and in walked Emily. She walked over to my bed and sat upon it. I let her sit down. She began to talk to me.

"Rose, can I ask you something?" She asked.

"Sure, you can ask me anything." I replied.

"Is mummy nice? I mean is she always like how she was earlier?" She asked me.

"Yes Emily. Mother is one of the nicest people you could ever meet. I'm lucky to have her as my mother. Elizabeth thinks that both mother and papa are perfect." I replied.

"Perfect? I thought nobody was perfect." She said.

"It's true that nobody is perfect. Elizabeth just thinks differently, that's all. She can be strange, but that makes me love her more. In this household we're taught to love one another." I said.

"Does she like to be called 'mummy'? I hope she isn't offended. If she is, I'll stop." Emily said. I simply shook my head.

"No, she doesn't mind. Actually I think she likes it that you call her mummy. She loves you." I said.

"Do you like me Rose?" Emily asked.

This was a hard question to answer. I hadn't really known Emily at all. She seemed nice and caring, but could she turn into a monster? I really hoped she didn't turn into one. Emily seemed fragile and delicate. Maybe Emily just needed time to get adjusted. Emily turned her head and I saw that she was wearing a very large bow in her hair.

"How large are your ribbons and bows Emily? That one is quite large. Mine are all small." I asked.

"They're all pretty large. Mama makes sure they're large so that I'm easily identifiable when I go into town." She said.

"You're allowed to go into town by yourself? You're lucky. I have to take my friends or go with Miss Sadie." I said.

"Brattleboro is a quiet town. Sure, there are the girls who go to Brattleboro Girls School. Those girls are stuck up and priggish. One of them got into a fight with me once. It was when I was ten, so two years ago. I was walking down State Street and there was a column of them walking, being led by their teacher. One of the girls made a snowball and threw it at me. It hit me in the face. The other girls laughed and giggled. I carefully rounded a corner, sat down and cried." Emily said.

"Oh Emily, that's mean of them. Why would anyone want to hurt you? Does your 'mother' hurt you?" I asked.

"Oh no, mama would never hurt me. She does sometimes swat me on the behind, but she rarely ever does. No, she loves me very much." Emily replied.

We both got up from our seats and walked out the door together. Emily was wearing a cream colored dress. She smiled and whispered

"I do hope mummy finds this dress to be nice."

I simply nodded. Mother would indeed find it nice. As Emily opened her mouth, I noticed that she had dental braces. I didn't say anything to her about them, for one of my friends had them. We walked down the stairs and into the dining room. The others were already in there. I expected them to get irate with us, but they didn't. Papa began to speak.

"So Emily, do you like your surroundings?" He asked.

"Yes. You have a nice home. I guess you are my true father. I never thought I'd be the daughter of a very powerful man." She said.

"Emily, Mr. Bukater and I are extremely grateful that you can rejoin us. We are now a complete family. I love the three of you. You're the greatest gift I could have ever received." Mother said.

Dinner was nearing completion. Elizabeth had since gone back to the nursery to go to bed, leaving Emily and I to sit with our parents. Mother became annoyed with something. Mother had this habit of being perfectly happy, but then as if someone dropped a coin; she'd turn annoyed and agitated.

"Rose, Emily would you please head upstairs? Your mother is having an episode." Papa said.

I was curious. I'd never really seen her do this before. I walked into Emily's room. The bed was turned down for her, and her nightdress was laid out. Suddenly, we heard footsteps and strangled sobbing. I opened the door and shouted after mother.

"Mother, what's going on? Are you all right? Please answer me." I choked out. She tried pushing me aside, but I wasn't going anywhere.

"Not now Rose. I need to be alone." She said through her sobs.

"No, no you're frightened. What are you frightened of? I've never seen you like this. It's scaring me." I said with concern. I walked into my parents' room. She sat on the bed and let out long, choked sobs. I turned away and shut the door. I heard her speak through the door.

"I can't tell them now. Oh God please help me." I continued to listen.

"Why did you have to get taken from me so soon? You could've been beautiful. You were beautiful. Your father always took you to his office to be doted upon by everyone. By the time we moved to that dreaded shithole you were getting sicker and sicker. Finally you died that day. You asked me for a glass of water. I went to get it for you, but when I returned you were dead. I blame myself for what happened. Please forgive me."

What was mother talking about? Suddenly I felt a hand grab me by the shoulder: it was papa.

"Go to the nursery little one. Your mother needs to cool off." He said.

"Why is she crying papa? Was it me?" I asked.

"Oh no, it wasn't you. Something happened a long time ago, and your mother feels guilty about it." He said.

"Was it Emily? Is she in trouble?" I asked.

"No. Rose. You go to the nursery. Sadie is waiting in there for you." He said in a sad tone.

I walked back to the nursery. Sure enough Miss Sadie was waiting for me.

"There you are. Please be quiet, Elizabeth is sleeping." Miss Sadie said.

"Can I ask you a question?" I said.

"Sure dear, you can ask me anything." She replied.

"What is mother guilty of? I mean she was in hysterics in her bedroom." I said.

"Oh Rose, you'll find out when you're older." She replied.

"But I'm twelve. Isn't that old enough?" I asked.

"No Rose. Your mother may act strict out in public, but here in the home, she's different. She may also have to run to the pharmacy soon." She replied.

I don't know what that meant, but it probably wasn't good. As I was changed into my nightdress, I was hoping mother would come down to tuck me and Elizabeth in for the night.

Sure enough, she came into the room like clockwork. Her emerald green eyes were swollen from the crying. Her cheeks were red and tear stained. Her hair was also down. I was amazed at how long it was.

"Rose, I'm sending you and Emily to your grandparents in Gregstown. I think that it would be for the best right now. You'll go to your grandparents, and then you'll go to Nantucket to stay with Mr. Creedon." Mother said.

I didn't want to leave here, I mean I love my grandparents; but what if mother needed me like I sometimes needed her? I couldn't just leave her. I didn't want to leave her.

"But what about you, aren't you coming with us? Please mother." I said, almost whining.

She looked at me and put her hand on my cheek.

"I'll only go for one night, but after that I must return. You'll both have fun." She said somberly.

She gave me a kiss and closed the door. I had difficulty sleeping. Down the hall, I could hear them argue. I could barely make out the words.

"Send them to see Peter? Ruth, you're crazy." Papa said.

"I am not! Peter loves the children. I am contacting him tomorrow, after I send Emily and Rose to Gregstown." Mother said.

"What if he says no? What will you do? Ruth please, you mustn't do this. If people catch wind of your problem…" Papa said tersely.

"Nantucket society has already labeled me a whore. You know how foolish they are! I cannot show my face there. I know Peter has forgiven me for what happened back in '89, but they sure haven't." Mother cried.

"Screw society. I mean I know I have a function to attend tomorrow night in Newport. I'll be staying at spring and Prospect Hill. You haven't told Emily the reason she was adopted have you?" Papa said.

"Of course I haven't told Emily. The children must be kept in the dark about everything until the time is right. As of right now, the time is not right. I'm worried about that child. She's twelve and she sleeps with a doll. The doll has a name of course; Madeline. She uses it for security. I saw the look in the child's face when she first saw me. She was truly frightened of me. I don't know why people are so afraid of me." Mother said.

"You must know every housewife in a thousand mile radius actually envies you. Magazine editors have written articles about you. You're obviously well received. Nantucket society doesn't call you a whore. They say that you have to have a lot of spunk to pull that off." Papa said, trying to comfort mother.

"I will accompany them to Gregstown. We're probably going to leave on the 11:30 train. I'll take a change of clothes for myself, as I'm staying overnight there. Mother will be happy to see Emily, as will father; that is if his condition isn't aggravated." Mother said.

"I assume you're talking about his C.F.D.? War will do that to a person." Papa asked.

"I remember when I was little, oh about four when he came home from the New England War. He was different. I remember him crying in the middle of the night." Mother replied.

I was now drifting off to sleep. I had a nightmare that night. I was in the park with Allison and I came home. The door was open and I walked into the house. There were bloody footprints and blood on the walls. I began to panic. I ran upstairs to the nursery, where in a pool of blood lay the body of Elizabeth. Her eyes had been gouged out. I then turned and ran to my parents' room. They lay there with all their organs taken out. I began to scream. I woke up screaming. The light came on in the hall, and the door opened. In walked mother and Miss Sadie. Mother was in her robe; Miss Sadie was in her nightdress.

"Rose, are you all right? What happened, did you have a scary dream?" Mother asked. I nodded yes. Tears were coming down my cheeks.

"I can interpret what it means Rose." Miss Sadie said.

"I didn't know you could interpret dreams?" Mother said to Miss Sadie. Mother looked intrigued.

"What was in the dream Rose?" Miss Sadie asked.

"Death, everyone was murdered." I said in a frightened tone.

"It simply means that you will possibly be criticized for bad manners. I have heard that you are going to see your grandparents in Gregstown. Is your grandmother critical of manners?" Miss Sadie asked.

"She can be. She's from England. They're all pompous over there." I said. Mother laughed, as did Miss Sadie.

"Rose, you just drift back off to sleep. We have to pack in the morning." Mother said almost in a whisper. Sure enough, my eyes were closed as soon as she was finished saying those words. It seemed like a few minutes later when I woke up to find it to be daylight. Elizabeth was already dressed and standing by my bed.

"Good morning, it's time to wake up." She said in a very, very happy voice.

"Go find mother and be with her." I said groggily.

"Hmph, I thought you liked mornings." Elizabeth cajoled.

"I'm leaving today to go to Gregstown." I said.

"But you can't do that! It's my tenth birthday. I won't get to celebrate with you?" Elizabeth solemnly said.

"Mother is insisting. I'm sure you'll have a nice birthday. Perhaps Miss Sadie can do something with you." I said, paying no attention to Elizabeth's pout.

"I want to go with you. Although I'll miss mama, and all the things we do in our alone time." She said.

"Grandmother doesn't like feeble children." I said.

"I am not feeble! I'm quite intelligent. You're the feeble one." She replied in anger.

"Elizabeth, you haven't mastered all of the basic functions. You know what I'm talking about." I said as she blushed.

"So!" Elizabeth exclaimed.

"Grandmother can't have that you know. She's from England. They hate everybody." I said.

I wish Elizabeth could get it. I often wondered what she and mother did during their alone time. If I were a betting girl, I'd say that it involved something with mother's body. Mother always wore a blouse with buttons on the front during their afternoon session. The fabric, while white was translucent enough to see that she wore a special kind of corset under it. This kind was for nursing. I have a theory that mother takes Elizabeth into the nursery and has her sit on her lap. She unbuttons the blouse, and unhooks her corset, allowing Elizabeth to suckle. I'm sure mother enjoys doing this with Elizabeth. Elizabeth seems so content when she goes for her nap.

Why didn't she ever do that with me? I mean am I supposed to be the master child? Papa loves me more anyways. They're so protective of me. They'd die if something did indeed happen to me, especially whilst at school. School, I hoped for the coming term to be pleasant. Emily was going to attend with me this year. Speaking of Emily, I wondered what she was doing at this very second.

I was dressed in a white frock with white stockings and my black Mary Jane shoes. I do not like to wear boots, because they make my feet hurt. Emily wore the same thing as me. Mother hailed a cab outside the house and we took it to the station. Once inside, we headed over to the ticket counter. Emily sighed.

"I was just here yesterday. I've ridden enough trains to last me a lifetime!"

"But Gregstown isn't Vermont. There's a ferry to Pownal, Vermont there, as it's on Lake Quanapowwitt." I said.

We headed to our platform. I was glad that we had checked our luggage through at the counter. The train was sitting there idling away. We were the first passengers to board, and it looked as though we would be the only passengers in the car we occupied. At 11:30 we rolled out of the station. I sat at the window and watched the scenery pass. We crossed the North River and into another part of the city. There were homes that looked stately in some areas, but in others some homes looked to be abandoned. Cambridge came next, and I saw massive crowds throughout. These were college students. The summer holidays must be fast approaching. As we turned west, the Peter River came into view. This year I'm going to be learning about the river and all of its tributaries.

The further west we got, the scenery changed. Finally, we entered Monkton County. Monkton County is the butt of many jokes. It isn't poor like they say it is, and if you know where to look you'll find large mansions there. Finally at 2:30, we arrived in Gregstown.

"This is what Gregstown looks like Rose?" Emily asked. Her straw hat blocked most of her view.

"Yes. Not quite like where we live, and certainly nothing like Brattleboro." I replied.

"Come girls, they've offloaded our luggage." Mother said as she took control of the situation. We walked over to where porters were unloading various pieces of luggage. I found my trunk (I had it engraved with my initials.) Next, Emily found hers. Mother only had a carpet bag with her. This bag was quite large (she probably had her nightclothes in it, as well as clothes for tomorrow when she returned.) We hailed a cab to take us to our grandparents' house. The homes we passed were quite stately.

Grandfather made his money in designing ships. The navy appointed him as a naval architect. He worked at a shipyard in Fall River where mother is from. From '70 to '74 he was in the army and then the army reserve. He fought in the New England War. He met papa during the New England years and they became friends. When mother married papa in 1890, he approved right off. Grandmother didn't really like papa at all. It could be his anti-Britain attitude. She didn't really understand Elizabeth. Once she told mother that Elizabeth would be better off in an institution. Mother balked at the idea. We pulled up in front of the house and got out of the cab. The driver helped us with our trunks. Mother rang the bell.

The door opened.

It was grandmother.

"Ruth, it's a delight to see you again. Hello Rose, and oh! You must be Emily!" She said.

"I haven't seen you since the day you were adopted. How have they treated you?" she asked.

"I have been treated very well, thank you." Emily replied.

We walked inside. To Emily, this was a new experience. The house was very large.

"John, Ruth and the children have arrived!" Grandmother cried out, hoping to get grandfather's attention. Sure enough, he came around the corner with a look of happiness in his eyes.

"It is nice to see you again Rose. Who is this who is with you?" He asked, motioning towards Emily.

"This is Emily. I just found out that she is my twin. Mother says that we're now a complete family again." I said as I hugged him.

"Good to see you Ruth. I trust that your trip out here was comfortable?" He asked.

"It was, the children were well behaved. I'd like to talk to you in private." Mother said.

With this, my grandparents and mother walked into the study and closed the door.


	3. Gregstown and Mother's Decision

CHAPTER THREE

GREGSTOWN

AND

MOTHER'S AGREEMENT

They had closed the door to grandfather's study. I knew that this would be something important. I walked close to the door and began to listen. Emily did the same thing. I heard mother speak.

"Father, it's all coming too quickly now. I can't hold it back any more. With Emily here now, the memories are flooding me."

"Ruthie, it's all right. If you want us to watch the children, we can do that." Grandfather said.

"Will you send for Elizabeth?" Grandmother asked.

"Yes, I will send for Elizabeth and Sadie at once, even though you don't like her at all mother."

"Ruth! I do love Elizabeth. I just don't understand her sometimes. She is very intelligent, and I just wish she'd act normal." Grandmother said.

"Where else do you plan on sending the children?" I heard Grandfather say.

"To Peter out on Nantucket." Mother replied.

"General Creedon may be a good man, but I don't think he is capable of looking after children." Grandfather said.

"He's looked after them before, but that was in '01." Mother said in reply.

"Did he like them? Were they good to him?" Grandmother asked.

"Oh yes, he loved the children very much. He wants to have them back." Mother replied.

"Then it's settled. The children will stay here for three weeks." Grandfather said.

"Good. I will take them to Nantucket myself." Mother said.

We backed away from the door and took seats on the sofa. Mother came out and looked at us.

"Rose, Emily come here." She motioned. We walked over to her.

She embraced us.

"I am not well right now; your grandparents are going to be taking care of you for the next three weeks. I hope you understand." She said as we nodded.

"I hope you get better, mummy." Emily said as she looked into mother's eyes.

"I will dear. I know I will." She said.

By now it was time for tea. Tea was lively, with discussion of sending Elizabeth to a special school.

"It could work. It could very well work. Elizabeth would do very well in a school for children who have the same affliction." Grandmother said.

"But where is a school like this? We don't have one where we live." Mother said with a forlorn look on her face.

"There's a school in Nyack. It's on Newstead and Maryland Streets. The teachers there know what they are doing. Your daughter's illness is what they teach about. They teach the student how to be socially acceptable, and how to live on their own." Grandmother said.

"It certainly sounds good. Do they have a pamphlet I could read?" Mother asked.

"Yes, in fact I saved one for you. Do it for Elizabeth." Grandmother replied.

"The cost doesn't appear to be too high. I think Elizabeth would fit in there quite well. She'd be with other children afflicted with the same thing." Mother said.

Tea was finished, and they sent us outside. The backyard of the home bordered a beach. There were of course dunes. The grass was coarse, almost like Bermuda grass. There were chairs sitting in the grass and these looked over the lake. The waves were crashing on the beach in a good rhythm. Emily and I decided to walk down to the beach. The wrack line was far from where we entered. To the north I could see cumulonimbus clouds.

Thunderstorms, something that they were talking about for tonight; I hated thunderstorms.

"Emily, look! See those clouds? Those are cumulonimbus clouds." I said.

"Thunderstorms must be coming this way." Emily said.

"They'll probably be here after dark. It just looks so serene out there right now. You know, grandfather has a boat." I said.

"I wonder if they'll take us out on it. I know that Quanapowwitt is large. It's the same body of water that mama takes me to back home." Emily muttered.

Mother came out to join us.

"What are you girls up to?" She asked.

"We're just looking at the lake. We might get some rain after dark." I said, pointing to the cumulonimbus clouds.

"Well, we'll be asleep when they come." Mother said.

"Will Elizabeth be coming to stay with us, mother?" I asked.

"Of course, we mustn't leave Elizabeth out of this. She's family too." Mother replied.

We went and sat on the chairs in the backyard. Mother didn't look well.

"What's wrong mother? You don't look very well." I asked with pleading in my eyes.

"I'm just not feeling well Rose. I think it's my mind." She replied.

"What are you thinking about mother?" I asked her.

"About you, Emily, and Elizabeth; and how I love you all. The memories come back to me. Some of them are bad." She said.

"I probably shouldn't be asking so many questions." I replied.

We continued to sit in the chairs. A servant had brought out some lemonade. We took it graciously. Mother sipped hers very slowly, while I drank it down very quickly. Emily also sipped hers slowly too.

Mother was troubling me. I've never seen her like this before. Grandfather hinted at mother going somewhere. I had heard him say once

"Why don't you go to Edward Briggs Hospital in Stockbridge? There are no locked doors there, and you can come and go as you please."

Mother balked at the idea, I could understand why. From what I had heard, Edward Briggs was a psychiatric institution that the very wealthy could attend.

Was mother mentally ill? I'd die if she was. I couldn't bear to handle the stress that that would cause.

Would papa support her? Papa wouldn't leave her, ever.

I would stick by her no matter what. No matter what happened. I would still love her.

After we were done sitting outside, we retired to the house. Mother announced she was tired and went upstairs to take a nap. Grandmother asked Emily if she liked their home.

"Do you like our home Emily?" Grandmother asked. There was no response.

"Emily?" She asked again.

"Emily Lovejoy Langdon!" She said a final time. Finally, there was a response.

"Yes. I do like your home. I think it's beautiful."

I saw grandfather go outside to the front porch. I followed him. He had a glass in his hand. We went outside.

"Hello Rose." Grandfather said. He took a sip out of his glass.

"Grandfather, what is wrong with mother?" I asked.

"It's stress Rose. Your mother is stressed out." He said.

"Is it Emily who's causing the stress?" I asked him.

"Oh no, it's not you or Emily. Your mother is just going through a tough time." He said.

"Can we talk about something else please?" I asked him.

"Sure, what do you wish to talk about?" He asked me.

"How long have you lived here?"

"Since '80. Back then, our block was completely undeveloped. We moved out here with your mother and Aunt Elizabeth. The next year, your Aunt Susan and Uncle John were born."

"Were you a happy family?" I asked him.

"Yes. We were a happy family. We still are."

"Do you think it will rain tonight?"

"Yes Rose, it will definitely rain. See those dark clouds? I just saw a bolt of lightning." He said.

We sat awhile longer and finally went inside for supper. Supper was roast beef with mashed potatoes. We all sat around the table. Grandfather was planning a trip on his boat. Mother liked the idea. Their boat was docked a half mile from the house. It was a simple vessel, sail and when needed oil powered. Grandfather determined that we all should go after Elizabeth arrived, it would only be fair. I also didn't realize that my grandparents owned a lot of board games. There was one that we owned and Elizabeth loved called _Mixed Pickles_. Mixed Pickles was a game where you had to create nonsensical sentences. Emily had also heard of the game, and in fact she owned it as well. Mother announced that she was tired and was retiring to her room.

"She sure is tired Rose." Emily said.

"I know, she was never like this before." I replied.

"Rose, Emily I think you should also head to bed. I will be upstairs in a few minutes." Mother said in a firm tone.

We walked upstairs and went to our respected rooms. My room overlooked the street. Mother's room was next to mine. She entered the room and helped me dress for bed.

"You behaved very well today Rose. During these next few weeks, I expect you to behave very well." Mother said as she was brushing my hair, putting it into a braid.

"I will behave mother. What about Emily? She'll behave won't she?" I asked.

"Of course she'll behave. All three of you will behave." Mother replied.

I walked over to the bed and climbed into it. Mother tucked me in and walked out of the room into Emily's room. Mother praised Emily, and seemed to enjoy talking to her.

"Did you enjoy your day today Emily?" I heard her say.

"Yes I did." I'd heard Emily utter.

It didn't make me angry that she was talking to Emily like this. I just wished mother would talk to me like she did to her. In a way it made me jealous. I drifted off to sleep.

The next morning was very wet. The rain had come in the night before and had covered the city with its wet blanket. Large puddles developed on the street. I heard mother on the phone, either with papa or Miss Sadie. I believed it was with Miss Sadie. She then walked into my room and got me ready for the day.

"Good morning Rose. I trust you slept well?" She asked.

"I did mother. I slept very well. I trust you did as well?" I asked her.

"Never mind how I slept dear. I worry about you sometimes." She said.

"You worry about me?"

"Of course dear, every time you go away to school, I die inside." Mother said.

"I didn't know you worried about me?" I said.

"Of course I do. You're my child. A mother always worries over her child." Mother lovingly said.

I took her word for it. I knew that mother wasn't feeling her best. I decided to ask her what tie Elizabeth and Miss Sadie were arriving from the city.

"They should be arriving after 2 PM. I will wait here for them, but then I must leave. I must do what I have to do." She said in response.

Emily walked into the room. She was wearing a white frock with a red pinafore. I didn't have a frock that matched hers (mother would have to have us match our frocks.) Elizabeth did have the same frock. I've even seen her wear it.

Breakfast was tense, but not so that it wasn't enjoyable. Mother was quiet. Grandfather struck up the conversation.

"Elizabeth and the nanny will be arriving today, are they not?" Grandfather asked.

"Yes dear, Ruth even said so." Grandmother replied.

"So she did. I'm sorry." He said.

"Do you like to play games?" Grandmother asked.

"Oh yes. I love to play bagatelle, and Mixed Pickles." Emily replied.

"Do you have friends Emily?" Grandfather asked.

"Oh yes. I recently made friends with a very naughty girl named Sophia Hobson." Emily said.

"What made her 'naughty' Emily?" Mother asked.

"Well for one thing, she'd always throw stones at people's houses. I saved her one day. She was walking down by the river, when she slipped and fell in. I jumped in and saved her." Emily said with happiness.

"So you saved her life? Did you get in trouble? What about Sophia?" Grandmother asked.

"I got scolded for having wet clothes and mama was also mad at me for being late, but I explained the situation. She wasn't angry with me after that. Sophia was extremely grateful." Emily said.

Breakfast was finished, and we went into our respective corners. Emily went to the front porch, and I went to the back. Mother saw me go outside without a hat on and she got cross.

"Rose! When you go outside, you need to wear a hat. You know how fair your skin is." She hissed.

"But mother, it's raining. The sun won't get me today." I replied.

"It doesn't matter. You must always wear a hat!" She said coolly.

I hated that one rule. I always had to wear a dopey hat whenever I walked outside. Today it would have helped, as it was raining. I walked around to the front of the house, and went to the front porch where Emily was sitting. I sat in one of the wicker chairs and looked out across the street. The rain was still coming down.

"It is rather dreary today, isn't it Rose?" Emily said.

I agreed.

"It's almost too dreary to do anything. Does it get like this in Vermont?" I asked.

"Almost every day as we live where the valley meets the shore. The fog rolls in every day during the summer. Often when mama and I go to Lundy, the trip is always in the fog." Emily said.

"You go to Lundy? I've never been there!" I said.

"Lundy is a ragged island north of Digby. Technically, it should be in Annapolis, but it belongs to Vermont. There are beautiful homes on Digby. All the wealthy live on the southwest portion." Emily continued.

"What about the poor townsfolk? Where do they live?" I asked.

"They live down by the ferry landing. They aren't really poor either. Most of them have millions of dollars." She said.

"Really? I guess there are no poor folks in our country. I've heard mother grew up 'poor' and it wasn't until after '85 that grandfather's Soldier Assimilation Program kicked in for the family. He was able to send mother and Aunt Elizabeth to school on that money. They went to school in Vermont. I guess that's where mother met your mother." I said trying not to sound too long winded.

"I wonder if grandfather will take us to the other side of the lake. Surely we'd end up in Annapolis?" Emily asked.

It looked as though grandfather was coming out to join us. He opened the door and walked out onto the front porch. He handed me my hat.

"Your mother wanted you to wear this." He said.

I took the hat and put it on my head. Mother won this time. He sat down on one of the wicker chairs and took out a cigarette.

"This is a very dirty habit. Don't ever smoke. I picked it up in the war; I was only intending to smoke during the war and quit afterwards. I only smoke five cigarettes a day." He said.

Smoking looked rebellious and it was. I secretly smoked a cigarette with Allison in the park once. It was unfiltered, and it was manly. I've even seen mother smoke before. Grandmother hated cigarettes. The rain still continued to fall, and it grew even heavier. By now it was 12:30, and surely Elizabeth and Miss Sadie were on their way. Thunder rumbled and grandfather paid no mind to it.

"I've heard worse." He said.

Our chairs were not getting wet as the deluge continued. I looked up at the rest of the house to find mother sitting facing the window in her room. She didn't look well.

"Please tell me what is wrong with mother?" I asked grandfather.

"Ever since she was young, she's been prone to these mood swings. They never got violent, but they did leave her sulking. It breaks my heart to see her like this. Your father doesn't care about them. He doesn't hate her, or her mood swings. He just doesn't understand them, that's all."

I knew mother wasn't a bad person. Sometimes people would like about her. I hated when people lied about her. It hurt my feelings. Mother took it in stride. She often regarded the gossip as "fodder for my personal gain." Mother also knew that she was sound socially. The elites had never experienced her mood swings. The other elites also thought Elizabeth to be a monster. That was something I could not stand. Elizabeth was not a monster. Elizabeth was a caring, loveable child.

Finally, it was a little after three o'clock. A taxicab pulled up and out stepped two familiar figures.

"Ah! Miss Rose! Miss Emily! How are you today?" Miss Sadie asked.

"We're sad because it's raining. How is Elizabeth?" I asked in reply.

"She slept on the train; she's still a bit sleepy." Miss Sadie said.

Suddenly, mother came through the front door. She embraced Elizabeth and kissed her over and over.

We were all together again.


	4. Mother Leaves & The cruise to Yarmouth

CHAPTER FOUR

MOTHER LEAVES

THE CRUISE TO YARMOUTH

Later that afternoon, mother decided to leave for Stockbridge. She called Papa on the phone and told him that she was leaving. Mother's attitude changed as she was talking to him. She went from somewhat depressed to even more depressed. As she hung up the phone, she ran to grandfather's study. She quickly closed the door. I heard her voice become shrill and staccato.

"He says that he's leaving! He can't bear to see me like this." She cried.

"Oh Ruthie, he is a very busy person. He wouldn't leave you." Grandfather said, trying to console her.

"He's having an affair! I know he is." She cried out.

It suddenly grew quiet. Almost too quiet; Emily turned to me and put her hand on her mouth, feigning shock.

"What _if_ he is having an affair Rose? How are we to react?" Emily asked, whispering to me.

"He wouldn't do that. Papa has class. Mother has everything he wants. He would never leave her." I replied in a low whisper.

Emily and I walked to the sitting room. Elizabeth and Miss Sadie were playing a game. We didn't wish to disturb them, as Elizabeth was quite enthralled in the game. By now mother walked out of the study. Her eyes were puffy and swollen. Grandmother had mother by the hand.

"We're departing. Girls, would you come here please?" Mother said. We walked over to her. Elizabeth straggled along moments later. We stood there. Mother knelt down to our level and she threw her arms around us, holding on for dear life. She kissed us one by one. I could tell she was scared of something. She left after that, and grandmother went with her.

We were alone with grandfather after that. Elizabeth showed concern in her eyes, but Miss Sadie quickly took her thoughts away from it. I noticed grandfather had gone into a small room. I followed him, and once inside I noticed that he had model ships adorning the walls.

"These are all models of ships I designed. You know, my company is in alliance with Harland and Wolff, of Belfast. They're coming up with the largest ships afloat. Not us. We design naval and fishing craft. To this date, the CRS _Bayberry_ is our largest product to date. Not like you'd be concerned with that, for you're only twelve; but it is the future, and by god I'm prepared." He said.

I noticed that he had pulled out a nautical chart. Papa had several of them, but his were different compared to grandfathers. I would study papa's charts religiously, that's where I knew my geography from.

"Little one, would you hand me my parallel rulers? Thank you." He said.

I handed the rulers to him.

"Where are we going to sail to?" I asked.

"Somewhere in Annapolis, I prefer Yarmouth. Yarmouth is an excellent port. The only problem with Yarmouth is that it's open to the southwest. If we leave here at 7 AM tomorrow, we should beat whatever weather will occur." He replied.

I walked out of the room. I found Emily sitting on the front porch, so I joined her. She looked sad, and I wondered what was wrong with her.

"What's wrong Emily?" I asked, concerned for her.

"I just feel like this is my fault. Mama should've never sent me to you. Mummy can't handle me. I'm a bad child." She said as she put her hand over her face, as if she was going to cry.

I put my hand on her shoulder. I could see Emily was beginning to cry. I wanted to ask her if she was going to be okay, but I decided to let her cry it out. Emily it seemed was out of sorts.

"_She really misses home. Our cruise on the lake tomorrow should take her mind off of things. I bet her mother is cruel and mean to her. She probably doesn't let Emily do anything but sit in her room all day."_ I thought to myself. I wanted to ask her if her mother was mean and cruel.

"Emily, is your 'mother' cruel to you?" I asked.

"No, I told you that she wasn't. She's the most wonderful person you'd ever meet. I just miss her that's all. This is the first time I've ever really been with strangers. Mama is very protective of me." She said half-hearted.

The homesickness was really setting in for her. Speaking of mother's, I wondered what mine was doing. Was grandmother comforting her, or did she leave mother in a ditch somewhere near Stockbridge? I also wondered what papa was doing. Papa was probably very sad that mother was going to a safe place. I remembered their argument. He tried to be sympathetic with her, but she wouldn't let him. Mother's pride was too strong. Papa had to be strong for her. Suddenly I heard the phone ring inside. One of my grandparents' maids answered. She went to go find grandfather. Momentarily, I heard him speaking. I listened.

"So she's all settled in? That's good to hear." He said as he waited for grandmother to reply.

"You tell her that we're behind her 100%, and that we love her for who she is." He continued.

"You'll be home a little after seven? All right dear, see you when you arrive." He said as he hung up the phone.

I wondered if Uncle John would pay a visit. I always liked Uncle John, for he was quite funny. He is a cartographer, and has a job at the Arrow Map Company. He always stuck to drawing the maps by hand, and they were just better that way. I did not like the machine drawn maps. Machine maps had a tendency to produce errors. He is good at what he does. I have several _Arrow Town Plan Books_ as well, and he gave each of them to me. For everything Uncle John was, his sister; my Aunt Jessica wasn't. Aunt Jessica could be considered a promiscuous person. Mother dies a little each time she sees her. I didn't really like her because she always tried to make me promiscuous.

There was one other aunt I forgot to mention: my oldest aunt, Aunt Elizabeth. Aunt Elizabeth has a daughter named Jacqueline. I detest my cousin, for she is a spoiled brat. I never liked it when she would come to visit me. She would always take my toys and hide them. My sister Elizabeth was frightened of Jacqueline. She would cry and fuss each time that Jacqueline would visit. Jacqueline was very nasty towards my little sister, calling her "feeble" and generally making fun of her. Mother would often punish Jacqueline. My mother wasn't too strict on punishment; often she'd use the line:

"Just wait until your father gets home. He'll deal with you then."

Oftentimes, I'd get a slap on the wrist from mother; that was if I was naughty. One time, I was so naughty, that she had Miss Sadie lock me in the sickroom. That was last year, when I was eleven. She never told papa why I was locked in the sickroom. I was only allowed to have my meals brought to me; I wasn't allowed to play with my dolls or any other toys. Mother was quite cross with me that day. I said a word so foul, that it made her stop whatever it was she was doing. I followed that word with _you_. She had had enough of that, and grabbed me by the wrist. She brought me upstairs and had Miss Sadie put me in the sick room. I still remember the sound of that key turning in the lock. I don't remember how long I had been crying, but I noticed mother in the room.

"Where did you learn that word Rose?" She asked.

"I learned it from papa and a girl at school." I replied. I began to cry a little more.

"I'll have to speak with your father about how he talks when children are present. Rose, you must never say that word in my presence. I don't care how you talk with your friends. I'll give you credit for time served. You are free." She said. I hugged her.

"See Rose, it's not even eleven o'clock yet. You still have the whole day to go to the park with Allison and your little friends. Go now." She said. I went to the nursery and quickly changed clothes. Mother said that it was a bit cold that day, so I would have to take my heavy coat. I ended up spending the rest of the day in the park.

Today however, it seemed that mother was the one in trouble. Not even Emily or Elizabeth could help her. I did miss her terribly. I saw a car pull into the driveway. Grandmother got out. Judging by the look on her face, she was depressed. She had walked up to the front porch. She saw Emily and me sitting there. She turned to speak;

"Girls, your mother is in a better place now. She can get the help she needs." She said.

"Does mummy have a problem?" Emily asked.

"Yes she does darling. I probably shouldn't be telling you this. I will only tell you this if you don't tell Elizabeth. I know your mother and your youngest sister have a close relationship, and if she hears this; she'll fuss. Your mother has a mood disorder. I've told her time and time again to take her medicine, which she does; but then she feels 'better', and it starts all over again. I love your mother dearly, and wish no harm to her; but this is too much. I can't bear to see her like this. It hurts me." She said with a voice that quavered.

We now knew the gravity of the situation.

"Grandmother, did mother ever say she wanted to commit suicide?" I asked. Grandmother's face went pale.

"Yes Rose. She wanted to be with 'her.' I don't know who 'she' is, but I assume it's not a good thing. Let us all go inside now. Supper is ready." She said.

This changed _everything_.

I didn't realize mother was hurting this much. Was it Emily who made mother like this? It couldn't have been her. Emily was too kind of a person to do this.

Supper that night was roast chicken. For once we ate with the adults. Grandfather began to speak.

"Tomorrow, the three of you are going to Annapolis. We sail at 7 AM." He said.

"What about Miss Sadie?" Elizabeth asked, her pleading eyes making an impact.

"She has to come. I need someone to maintain order. Think of your Miss Sadie as your CO."

"What's a CO?" Emily asked.

"A CO is a Commissioned Officer. I served under many during The New England War." He replied.

"Do you know General Creedon" I asked him.

"Of course, I had the distinction of serving in the 501st during the war. He commanded it, and eventually became the Grand General of the Grand Army of the Republic. He is a good friend of mine, and has been a friend of the family for years." He said.

I ate the rest of my meal. Elizabeth, as usual was the first one to go upstairs for bed. I followed shortly thereafter. I was crawling beneath the sheets when I saw Emily walk into my room.

"I'm sleeping in your room tonight Rose. My room is in use." She said.

"What do you mean?"

"Elizabeth is sleeping in it!" She replied.

"Sure, you can sleep with me in my bed." I said to her.

"Thank you. I must warn you however; I am a heavy sleeper, and I have an 'issue.'" She said to me.

"Do you wear something to curtail that?" I asked.

"Yes. Please don't make fun of me for it." She said.

"I wouldn't make fun of you, look at Elizabeth." I replied.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"She has the same problem, but it's all the time." I said.

Emily climbed into bed. We both drifted off to sleep. It only felt like a few minutes before it was daylight. Miss Sadie came into our room.

"You will be wearing your sailor outfits today, with black stockings to match." She said.

After we were dressed, Miss Sadie brushed our hair. After packing to last for three days, we left. The vessel was docked a half mile from the house. I looked at it. It looked like one of those small coastal liners that traveled along the coast taking tourists to see different cities. Our sitting room at home was adorned with posters for these companies.

"I rebuilt this vessel from the keel up. I found her remains sitting in a marsh in York, near the Pubnico River's entrance. I had my company send a barge and a crane, and we lifted it onto the barge and sailed back to Gregstown. She is oil powered. Coal, sad to say; is in the past." Grandfather said.

We walked aboard. It was spacious. A half hour later, and we cast off. I stayed at the stern, to watch the wake. The water may have looked blue in this small harbor, but it was a murky brown. We passed the breakwater that protected this harbor, and out into the lake we went. I could feel us picking up speed. Gregstown was off to my right. I could see the high rise buildings. Each of them looked important. Behind them, off to the northwest, a large hill lurched in the distance. I wondered what the hill was named. Grandmother came to the stern.

"What is that large hill called?" I asked.

"Oh, that would be Mount Brenna. It's seven hundred feet above sea level. It looks imposing, but it really isn't. It reminds me of the Pennines back home in England. I took your mother and your Aunt Elizabeth there when they were eleven. The view is quite nice." She said.

Gregstown was slowly sliding off into the horizon, but Mount Brenna still looked imposing in its entire splendor. To my left, was nothing but blue. Suddenly, I could see a dark line above the horizon, it undulated a bit.

This was Annapolis.

Two hours later, we arrived at the entrance to Yarmouth Harbor. The coast up here was rocky, and the groundswell sent up massive showers of spray. The harbor was a busy place. Boats of different varieties chugged along. We passed several stately yachts, one of which Emily recognized.

"They're here!" She exclaimed.

"Who's here?" I asked.

"My parents, maybe they're staying in town." She said.

Would I possibly get to meet the family that had been taking care of Emily for twelve years? I would hope so.

We docked and disembarked. It wasn't a far walk to the hotel. Everything in this city was small, unlike Gregstown, or even the city that I live in. The hotel was four stories. We entered the building. I took in the sight of the lavish lobby. Chandeliers hung from the high ceiling, and the tables were set for dinner. It seemed like no expense was spared to make the guests happy. As we were walking, I saw a black haired woman speaking in a rather shrill voice. The man who accompanied her had his back turned to me, so I couldn't get a good look at him.

Then he turned. He had a moustache like papa, but this man lacked the beard that papa has. I heard him speak to his wife.

"Vic, look behind you." He said. She turned around. Emily's eyes grew large.

"Mama, is that you?" Emily said. She began to run.

"Oh Emily, it's me. I miss you so much!" The woman said.

This was the woman who had been taking care of Emily. She didn't look mean, but I couldn't tell. I didn't like her one bit. She didn't look like a mother; rather she looked like a woman who liked to go to parties.

"So you're the person who has taken care of my sister for the last twelve years?" I asked.

"Yes. You must be Rose. I have heard so much about you. The last time I saw you, you were just an infant." She said.

This woman had an air about her that screamed arrogance. She sounded arrogant. Mother never seemed arrogant, but there were times when she did. Even I did at times. Emily wasn't snobby like this woman, this woman seemed unhappy.

"Rose, where is your mother? Who are you here with?" She asked.

I didn't want to answer, but grandmother and Sadie caught up with me.

"I'm here with my grandparents and my nanny." I said.

"Excuse me miss, is she bothering you?" Miss Sadie asked.

"Oh no, I'm Victoria Langdon, I'm Emily's mother." She said. Emily hugged the woman closer.

"Oh! I'm Sadie Malden. I take care of Miss Emily at the Bukater house. She is really obedient." Miss Sadie said.

"That's my Emily. She's a darling. The whole town of Brattleboro loves her. Even when she goes out on her own, she acts obedient. Will you join me for tea? There are some things I have to tell you about Emily." The woman said.

Miss Sadie took us to our room after telling Misses Langdon that she would join her for tea. Miss Sadie is quite wealthy, she isn't of low standing. I was anxious of what she would say. We weren't allowed to have tea with Miss Sadie and Mrs. Langdon.

"She'll probably tell Miss Sadie about the tantrums." Emily said.

"What tantrums?" I asked.

"Oh, when I get very angry; but that won't happen. Daddy says that I have a disorder that causes them. They don't happen when I don't get what I want." She said.

"Oh, well then I'm glad of that." I replied.


	5. Yarmouth

CHAPTER FIVE

YARMOUTH

We hadn't even been in Yarmouth an hour and already I'd met Emily's adopted mother. As I'd said before, I didn't like this woman. She acted like she needed pills to keep her sane. She probably does. She designs corsets and is into corsetry or so I've heard from mother. I know this trip was supposed to keep our minds off of it, but it wasn't helping much. I wondered what she was doing at the moment.

"Looks like Miss Sadie will be having her tea with mama." Emily said.

"I know. What will it mean for us?" I asked.

Emily just shrugged her shoulders. Grandmother walked up to us.

"Go to your room and change for tea. I expect pinafores on both of you. I will be having tea with you." She said.

"But what about grandfather, will he join us?"

"No, he has met with some of his colleagues from the yard." She said.

We walked to our room. We changed our clothes, which was a simple affair. I helped Emily tie her pinafore, and she mine. We walked into our drawing room to find grandmother sitting on the couch.

"You look pretty as pictures." She said. Her accent faltered, but was present.

Grandmother is from England. She's been here long enough to have lost the majority of her accent, but it still shows up from time to time. I love grandmother; she's always nice to us. She doesn't trust papa however. I've only heard grandmother be mean to mother only once, and that was when she was in a "mood." Grandfather came into the room.

"Well Edie, I'm going out with Bill and Richard to the tavern on Kempt Street." He said.

"Do be careful, this is a small town. The residents might not like Gregstowners like us showing up. If you meet anyone you know from the war, please call me so that I will eat in the drawing room with the children. If you decide to come for dinner, we will all meet you." She said.

He left, and we resumed tea.

"We're going for a drive in the country tomorrow. Route 3 is splendid during June. We might drive to Shelburne, which is about forty miles distant from here. 103 is quicker, we'll take that on the way back. We'll have what I like to call 'gypsy tea' in Pubnico." She continued uninterrupted.

I liked the idea of "gypsy tea." I read that it was tea consumed outdoors. Grandmother seemed to have experienced many of these teas in her youth.

Outside it grew dark. Rain began to fall.

"It looks like we've beaten the weather into Yarmouth." I said.

Grandmother nodded in agreement.

Grandmother wasn't like the other English ladies. Those ladies were stuffy. Suddenly, I heard that high nasal voice again.

"_Oh god, here comes that horrid Victoria woman again."_ The door opened. It was Miss Sadie and Mrs. Langdon.

"Oh Mrs. DeWitt, if I may ask you, I'd like to take Emily for the afternoon, maybe even for the night. I'd like to speak with her. Sadie says it's all right. I just need your approval." She said.

"I don't see why not. You are of course her mother. Just as long as you bring her back in the morning, we've hired a car and we'll be taking a drive to Shelburne." Grandmother said.

The door shut and Emily looked at me with excitement in her eyes.

"Do you really have to go Emily?" I asked.

"This is my mother we're talking about. Of course I have to go." She cajoled.

I didn't want Emily to go. I really didn't want her to. I tried pleading with her.

"You don't really want to go do you?" I asked.

"Really I do want to go. I must go. I miss her." She said with excited eyes.

I couldn't stop her. She got up and walked over towards the woman. I rolled my eyes out of sight of grandmother.

"Now Emily, you're sure your mother approves of this?" She asked.

"Of course I approve of this. Why wouldn't I?" She said.

"I have my reason not to." Grandmother said.

"You've never liked me, even from my school days." She said.

"That's not true Mrs. Langdon. I think you've done a good job with Emily. She has impeccable manners." Grandmother said.

"She has impeccable manners because I forced them into her. She was quite wild before, like one of the girls in her storybooks." She said

"You mean Wild Kitty?" said Emily.

"Yes Emmy, Wild Kitty." She said.

She called her "Emmy", but Emily called her "Mama." This I couldn't believe. I only call mother mama if I'm frightened or something like that, but even then she dislikes me using the term.

Mother never had a pet name for me, unlike Emily. I guess "Rosie" counted, but only papa really called me that. I was glad I had parents, who loved me very much, unlike my friend Sasha Williamson. Her father would hardly speak to her, especially when it came to school matters. I wondered what mother was doing.

Grandmother and I had tea in relative silence. She asked me what I'd hoped to gain during the upcoming school term. I said "I'm hoping Emily doesn't do anything foolish."

"Oh she won't. It's you I'm worried about."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, I know things, I know about that girl you despise, and how much she irks you." She said.

"How do you know?" I asked.

"Oh, I talk to your mother on the telephone every day. I have to make sure she takes her pills." She said.

"Mother stopped taking her pills when Emily arrived. She dumped them into the sink and washed them down. I watched her do it." I said

"Oh I see. She did something foolish. She lied to me, saying that she took her pills. Now she's paying the price. She was talking like a mad woman on the way there."

"Don't say that about mother. She's not mad!" I said.

"Rose, if only you knew your mother's past." She said.

"You forced her to take pills because you're afraid of mother's creativity!" I said putting my teacup down on the saucer.

"No Rose. I embraced your mother's creativity. Your grandfather was the one afraid of it. I remember her getting a camera for Christmas in '83, when she was thirteen. She took lots of pictures of us and her friends at school. It was kodachrome, as we couldn't afford monochrome film. She loved her camera."

"When did she go to the hospital?" I asked; weary of grandmother's treatment of mother.

"She went after she turned thirteen. I didn't want her to go, but it was for the best." She said.

"She's even said she hated her pills and that you shouldn't remind her every day to take her pills. She can function without them." I said, sticking up for mother.

"Rose, your mother can't function without the pills. You know this. I know this. She was in your terms, naughty for what she had done."

"Don't call mother naughty!" I demanded.

"That was a bit extreme. I'm sorry Rose." She said.

Tea was over, and grandmother retired to her room. I looked out the window at the rain falling. Emily was probably happy to see her "mother." I didn't like the woman who had taken care of her for the last twelve years; I despised her with my heart. I would let Emily know.

Hours later, Emily came back. She looked tired. Elizabeth had been asleep for an hour or two. Sure enough we retired to our bed.

"I had tea with grandmother this afternoon; you missed quite a lively discussion." I said.

"About mummy or something of that nature?" She asked.

"Yes. It was about mother. Grandmother said she was naughty for not taking her pills." I said.

"I take pills. They're for my behavior. I can't function without them." Emily said.

"Let's get to sleep." I said.

Emily admitted she took pills. Papa and I didn't take pills, unless they were for headaches.

Sleep overcame both of us.

The next morning, we dressed and ate breakfast.

"Emily I want to tell you something." I said.

"What?" She asked.

"I don't really like your mother Emily. I think she hates me." I said.

Emily feigned shock, but I could tell that she was concerned.

"Mama actually likes you Rose. Why don't you like her?" She asked.

"I think she mistreats you, that's why I don't like her." I said.

"As I've said before, she doesn't mistreat me. Why are you so afraid of her?" She asked.

"Oh, I'm not afraid of her; I just don't like her that's all." I said.

We ate breakfast and grandmother entered the room.

"The three of you are going into the country today. We will be having gypsy tea in Pubnico." Grandmother said.

"What about grandfather?" Elizabeth asked.

"He isn't going to come with us. It will be fun Elizabeth. You have to trust me on this." She said.

Elizabeth had trust issues with many people. Grandmother was included in this lot of people. She often was weary of most people. The only ones she trusted were me, mother, papa, and Miss Sadie. Miss Sadie was more than just a friend for Elizabeth; she loved her like she loved mother and papa. Elizabeth trusted me, but was reluctant to go.

We walked down to where the car was waiting. It was spacious. We headed out of town. The sky was bright. Puffy cumulus clouds framed the sky. We wound our way down route 3. I read a sign that said Pubnico was twenty miles distant. We finally entered Pubnico. Pubnico was one of those towns that you read about in some storybook, or in the picayune. We found the place to have tea. Grandmother had it packed away in a thermos.

"Your grandfather took me here after the war. We had a lovely time. Tea was flowing freely and we had a jolly time." She said.

"Can I call mother when we get back to the hotel?" I asked.

"Yes you may. But make sure you do it alone. I'm sure she will love to hear from you." Grandmother said.

We pulled over and got out the tea cups and saucers. I sat upon the earth. Grandmother poured the tea into my cup, followed by Emily.

"Emily, do you have to take pills?" Grandmother asked.

"Yes, for my behavior. I get out of sorts without them." Emily said.

"But can you function without them?" Grandmother asked.

"No, not really; I shouldn't be telling you this." Emily said.

"You can say anything. I encourage it." Grandmother cajoled.

"Do you need to be reminded to take the pills?" Grandmother asked.

"Yes. Mama reminds me every day to take them." Emily said.

"Aren't you a little too old to be calling your mother 'mama'?" Grandmother asked.

"No not at all." Emily replied.

"I guess you still believe in childish things Emily." She said.

"I'm growing up you know. I'm twelve years old. I'm old enough to make my own decisions." Emily said resignedly.

Elizabeth was quiet during this time. She looked down at her tea cup.

"How come you have to take pills, but Rose doesn't? I find it strange." Elizabeth said.

"Rose is entirely different than me; I have what my father calls Bipolar Disorder." Emily said.

"What is Bipolar Disorder?" I asked.

"It's when you have sudden mood swings. One day I went from happy to sad to angry and finally back to happy again. The pills help me calm down. My father diagnosed me and prescribed me the pills."

"Oh, you're not going to always be mean are you Emily?" Elizabeth asked.

No, I'm never mean, I just get out of sorts." Emily replied.

"That's good. Sometimes I get out of sorts too." Elizabeth said.

Tea was over and we headed back to Yarmouth. Route 103 was faster than 3 and we made excellent time. We arrived back at the hotel. I was the first to get back to the room. I saw the phone. Grandmother gave me the number for mothers' private phone line. I dialed the numbers and I heard ringing. Suddenly a woman who seemed out of it answered the phone.

"Hello?" The woman said.

"Mother, it's me Rose." I said.

"Oh Rose, I miss you terribly." Mother said.

"You sound so out of it" I said.

"Oh Rose, you have no idea. They let me go into town, but often I take a nap. I just woke up actually. Where are you now?" She asked.

"We're in Yarmouth, Annapolis at this moment. We had gypsy tea in Pubnico." I said.

"Did you go to the spot?" She asked.

"I assume it was the spot, as there was sandy soil and portagee pines there, there were two spruces." I said.

"That's the one!" She said, excitedly.

"How long are you going to be there?" I asked.

"Two months, then they're sending me to a home on Martha's Vineyard for another month. I won't get to see you or the others. Your father is staying in Newport. If you wish to talk to him, you can call him. I love you, Emily, and Elizabeth. I love you all with my heart. I must go, for it is group time." She said.

She hung up first. I was relieved that she was okay, but she was out of sorts. Elizabeth entered my room.

"Emily is doing it. Can you calm her down?" She asked.

"Whatever, Elizabeth." I said.

Suddenly, Emily entered. She was hyper and excited.

"What is it that you're so excited about?"

"I don't know. I don't know what I'm so excited about." Emily said.

We had dinner with grandmother that night. Emily was back to normal. For the first time in my life, I was concerned about a sibling.


	6. Mr Creedon

CHAPTER SIX

MR. CREEDON

We had arrived back in Gregstown. The next day, we drove down to Stockbridge. We pulled up to Edward Briggs Hospital. Mother was here. We entered the building, which actually looked more like a mansion than anything. Grandmother walked up to the receptionist and asked if mother was in. They said she was.

"Now girls, I must warn you your mother will be out of it. So don't barrage her with questions." She said.

I actually got to see her again. I wanted her to touch me, hold me again.

We walked up to her room. She was sitting on the couch.

"Rose, Emily, and Elizabeth! How lovely it is to see you again." We went up to her and hugged her. She sighed after Elizabeth hugged her.

"Today you'll be meeting Mr. Creedon. He's flying all the way from Nantucket to come get you."

"Really?" Emily asked.

"Yes Emily. You'll like Mr. Creedon; he's quite friendly towards children." Mother said.

"Does Mr. Creedon live on Nantucket?" Elizabeth asked.

"Yes Elizabeth, he does." Mother said.

We all left her room. We stopped by the front desk.

"She's coming with us to Pittsfield, which is okay is it not?" Grandfather asked.

"Yes, that is all right; she can come and go as she pleases." Mother walked outside. I could tell she enjoyed the sunlight on her skin. We got into Grandmother's car and drove to Pittsfield. Grandfather followed us in his car. We arrived at the Pittsfield aerodrome. Sure enough there was a plane waiting for us.

"Hello everyone, glad you could make it." The man said.

Now I had met Mr. Creedon when I was six, only that time mother accompanied me. This time, she wouldn't accompany us to Nantucket.

"Oh Peter I'm so glad you could take the children. How long will the flight be?" Mother asked.

"Oh, the flight should only be an hour, forty five minutes if we push it." He said.

Our luggage was put into the plane and the four of us got in and sat down. Grandmother wouldn't let mother kiss us goodbye, hinting at she would see us again. We taxied down the runway and then hit full throttle. We took off. Instantaneously I could see the landscape below. We flew across rivers and towns. We flew over a large city. Miss Sadie recognized it as Springfield. We banked right and flew over collections of villages. We banked left and we flew over a large bay with several islands in it. Emily guessed one of the cities to be Newport. I saw the naval fleet anchored in the bay, and off to the north I saw a large city which I assumed was Fall River. Moments later we passed another large city, which was New Bedford. Under us was nothing but water. We passed an island, which Miss Sadie said was Martha's Vineyard. Ahead of us in the haze was Nantucket. Momentarily Nantucket showed its face; it looked serene and peaceful. I could feel the plane descending. A few minutes later, we landed.

At the aerodrome Mr. Creedon showed us to his car. It was a large vehicle. We all got in, and we drove out of the aerodrome property and onto the road. We followed the road until we came to a rotary.

"Typical summer drivers, don't know how to drive in a rotary." He said.

"Look at that one, he's having trouble." Emily said.

"Let him pass." He said.

We exited the rotary and continued up Orange Street. Ahead was an intersection.

"All that progress for a one way street?" I asked.

"Yup, all the way from Main Street until now it's one way; we'll go Republic Street instead." He said.

We turned right onto Republic and we followed it. The buildings looked gray and dilapidated, but rest assured; they were quite habitable. Republic Street took us into the heart of town. Main Street was cobblestoned; we got jostled around as we drove over the stones. Finally, we got to a paved street. Ahead of us lay a large brick house. We parked on the street and got out of the car. The house was as I said earlier, large. We walked up the front steps. He opened the door.

"You keep your door unlocked?" I asked him.

"Of course, the person who decides to rob me will get a Blodgett pistol pointed at him and possibly fired upon. I am general of the army you know." He said.

"But don't you have to sit at a desk all day and write papers?" Emily asked.

"Unfortunately yes, but I have acquired some leave. Your mother is a good friend of mine, and I decided to help her in her hour of need." He said.

"Why aren't you married?" Elizabeth asked.

"That would take too much time to answer, I was married once." He said.

"Was she pretty?" Elizabeth asked again.

"Yes. She was beautiful. She had red hair and piercing green eyes." He said.

We walked in. The house was spacious. The parlor was large and had plush couches in it. On the wall, there was a painting of a woman who looked familiar.

"Why is there a painting of my mother on your parlor wall?" I asked.

He blanched.

"As I said, she is a very good friend of mine." He said.

Miss Sadie came to collect us. Mr. Creedon showed us to our rooms.

Emily and I were to share a room. Elizabeth got her own room. Our room had a couch. I sat down while Emily unpacked her trunk.

"They say this is the storybook island. Our capitol was here from 1666 until 1766. I would like to see the old capitol building, and visit the historical museum." She said.

Our door opened. It was Miss Sadie.

"I heard it will rain, I brought your Macintoshes just in case. Are you going to change clothes?" She asked.

We decided to change clothes. Elizabeth joined us in a walk around the house. We ran into Mr. Creedon.

"I see you enjoy my home. Perhaps we can drive out to the beach later?" He said.

"Yes, that would be nice. Can it just be Elizabeth, Rose, and I?" Emily asked.

"Of course it can be you three." He said.

Miss Sadie blushed.

"I can arrange your rooms while you're gone. I guess you don't want to have me around much longer?" She said.

We laughed.

"Of course we want you around, but can you take a break? I mean you work so hard, perhaps you'd want to take a break from us for a little while." I said.

She agreed. We followed Mr. Creedon down to the street and got in his jeep.

"Where are we going?" Elizabeth asked.

"We're going to Miacomet. It's on the south shore." He said.

We drove up Gay Street past the academy school.

"I went there until I was fourteen. The owner of Puritan Airlines also went there. His name is Victor Kantstantanapolis. I got into a fight with him over Jessica Parker. I won, and he never touched her again. We're friends now, and he gives me deals to fly his airline or use his shipping companies." He said.

"Do you ever get lonely?" Emily asked him.

"Sometimes." He said dryly.

We passed the school and drove down to Hussey Street.

"Do you know why mama is in the hospital?" Elizabeth asked.

"That's a tough one, but she's always had this problem. There was one event that sent her over the edge."

"It wasn't me coming home was it?" Emily asked.

"No, but that is one contributing factor into why you were sent away in the first place." He said.

"I feel like you know there's more going on than what they're telling us." I said.

"Sometimes secrets must be kept in order to protect the person who has them." He said.

"But mama has no secrets. She said so herself." Elizabeth said.

Mr. Creedon laughed.

By now we were past the New England War monument and headed up Milk Street.

"Do you like papa?" Elizabeth asked.

"He's been a good friend of mine for years. You might actually see him during your time here." He said.

We made a left onto Prospect Street, and then a quick right onto Joy Street. We passed a large cemetery.

"Is your family buried here?" Emily asked.

"Yes. Along the Proodian Road, let's go in and take a look." He said.

We drove in and followed the rough cemetery roads. Finally we came to the monument.

"Here it is. My grandmother is buried right here. My grandfather is right next to her."

"Your grandfather was president of the republic?" I asked.

"Yes, yes he was. My father was also president. I'm thinking of getting into the game myself." He said.

"Is that all it is; a game to you?" Emily asked.

"Politics is nothing but a game. When one gets tired of the rules, they make new rules." He said again.

"Mama and daddy are republicans, but grandmother is a democrat, she's so conservative. My parents use the liberal parenting style." Emily said.

"Ha! Are they now?" Mr. Creedon said laughing.

"What about you Mr. Creedon, what are you?" I asked.

"I'm a republican, I'm quite liberal myself. I believe children are meant to be seen and heard. Your grandmother Emily, she believes children are meant to be seen and not heard." He said.

"Exactly, she's so stuffy." Emily said.

We left the cemetery and headed down the road. The pavement ended and now we were on a dirt road.

"Welcome to Somerset Road." Mr. Creedon said. The road was very rough. There was washboard and dips. Elizabeth called the dips "Thank you ma'am's." We passed through a residential neighborhood and finally out onto an open plain. We passed a radio tower of some sort.

"Coast Guard communications tower, the station here is one of the more important ones." Mr. Creedon said.

Ahead was a ridge of dunes. I could see the ocean. We drove up the trail and onto the beach. We jumped out of the jeep.

The sand felt good on our feet. We took off our shoes. Mr. Creedon surveyed the horizon.

"Thunderstorms off to our west northwest, they'll probably be here before dark. This summer's been rainy so far. That means all the tourists will be in town tomorrow." We decided to walk around the beach for a little while. Elizabeth sat in the sand.

"Elizabeth, you're going to get sand in your bloomers!" I hissed.

"Leave her alone. Don't get bossy with her. Let her be herself." Mr. Creedon said.

I relented but what would Miss Sadie say when she was to prepare Elizabeth for bed? I wondered.

We jumped back into the jeep and drove off. Ten minutes later, we were back at Mr. Creedon's house.

Dinner that night was a splendid affair. Mr. Creedon made us laugh several times. Finally Miss Sadie came to collect us for bed.

We went to bed that night with one thing on our minds: what would we do tomorrow? Emily voted on going to the history museum, while I voted on the beach. On the window I heard a familiar noise.

"It's raining Emily; I guess you win the vote tomorrow." I said, but she was already asleep.

The next morning was gray and wet. We ate a quick breakfast and donned our Macintoshes. We walked down Broad Street. The museum was on our left. We entered. Inside there was a statue of Mr. Creedon's father. The statue was made of bronze. There was a sign located at the bottom of the statue that read

_Peter Bradford Creedon_

_Dedicated 14th March 1888 by the residents of Nantucket_

There was a hall of presidents. Each president had a bust and a few facts about them. My favorite was Chauncey, not because he served five terms, but because he seemed a lot like papa. Emily's favorite was Peter B. Creedon Sr. because the arts flourished during his administration. The one we liked least was Joseph Burgess, only because he switched from being liberal to conservative during his administration. Mr. Creedon could tell us more about him, because he was Mr. Creedon's commander in chief from 1889 to 1896. There was even a bust of our current president. Papa didn't like him, but I did somewhat. Mother even showed some distrust towards him. He was Susan's father. He was a civil war hero who married his current wife in 1889. He was old as dirt, and he probably wouldn't live past his term in the present. We walked out of the hall of presidents and into the civil war exhibit. Our paternal grandfather was exhibited extensively and we learned a few facts about him, like how he captured McGreaves on North Mountain. There were uniforms and maps of the conflict. Another exhibit showed Mr. Creedon's father as the founder of the 501st. Emily took pictures of another exhibit, while I walked into another room. This room featured Ellis Creedon as the republic's founder. I seemed to like Ellis, and the museum even pointed out that his house was able to be visited.

"Emily, we can visit Ellis's house. Maybe when we're done here we can go walk to it." I said.

"Yes, let's do that." Emily said.

After we were done at the museum, we walked the short distance to Ellis's house. The house was small and it featured one common room and two bedrooms. His children must've been cramped in the house. Afterwards, we walked up Centre Street back to Mr. Creedon's house. The rain wouldn't let up. Luckily our Macintoshes kept us dry. The walk up Centre was peaceful.

"No Elizabeth to spoil our fun." I said.

"Oh stop it Rose, Elizabeth isn't a bad person. She needs love right now. I know how close she is to mummy." Emily said.

"I know she's close. It's almost unhealthy. This separation must really be taxing her to the limit." I said.

"You mentioned that we were from Philadelphia. Do you have any memories of Philadelphia?" Emily asked.

"I remember being in a green house and there was park all around it. Mother didn't seem happy at all. I remember her crying a lot. Then we left." I said.

"You just left?" She asked.

"Yes. We went to Newport, there Elizabeth was born. We were both two, but you didn't live with us." I said.

"Was Miss Sadie with you?" Emily asked.

"Yes she was." I said.

I'm telling you they have a secret. I just know they do." Emily said.

"How we moved out of Philadelphia so quickly, to Newport and finally to our current home?" I asked.

"Yes. Mummy has a little secret that we must find out. It could hurt or help us." Emily said.

"I think it will hurt us." I said.

"Search your feelings Rose. You know some secrets are meant to be broken." Emily said.

"Yes, but remember what Mr. Creedon told us." I said.

"But I'm dying to know the secret, Aren't you?" Emily asked.

"I don't know." I said.

We made our way back to the house. Elizabeth was sitting on the steps in the rain.

"Elizabeth, what are you doing out in the rain?" Emily asked.

"I want mama. I want her so much." Elizabeth said.

"Can you think of something other than that?" Emily asked.

Elizabeth began to cry.

"No I can't. I need her, I need her desperately." She said.

"Poor thing, look how she misses mummy so much."

"Don't call me a poor thing Emily!" Elizabeth shouted.

The door opened, it was Miss Sadie.

"Elizabeth! What are you doing getting all wet?" She asked.

"I'm waiting for mama." Elizabeth said.

"Oh honey, she isn't coming back for a while" Miss Sadie said.

"What about papa?" Elizabeth asked.

"Your father is coming for a visit." She said.

Elizabeth suddenly brightened up.

"He is?" She asked.

"Yes, tomorrow he will be here." Miss Sadie said.

Elizabeth smiled.

We ate dinner while discussing what we saw at the museum.

"You saw the statue of my father, is that correct?" He asked.

"Oh yes, it was made of bronze." I said.

"Did you spit on Hawkes's bust?" He asked.

"No! Don't be silly." Emily said.

I wonder what Susan would do if we spat on her father's bust? She'd probably never speak to me again. Susan was kind of mousy and quiet. Her only claim to fame was that her father was the president of the republic. I decided to change the subject.

"Have you ever been to Philadelphia?" I asked.

"Why yes I have. The last time I was there was back in '95." He said.

"So twelve years ago?" Emily said.

"Yes, it was when you two were born." He said.

"Was mother unhappy?" I asked.

"I don't remember if she was. I think she was overjoyed that she was having twins." He said.

"Were you married to mama?" Elizabeth asked.

He grew pale and uneasy.

"No, I was never married to your mother what makes you ask?" He said.

"Because mama is on your parlor wall dressed in a wedding gown." Elizabeth said.

She was talking about the portrait.

"Yes. Yes I was married to your mother from '88 to '89. We had a good marriage." He said.

"Why so short?" I asked.

"You'll find out later." He said.

Was this the secret? No, it couldn't be the secret, the secret was much larger. Perhaps this was part of the secret, the only one we'd get to hear. Mother's secret would eat away at us, perhaps our very souls. With papa coming tomorrow I could only hope that he could tell us what he and mother was hiding from us. Sadie came to collect us. As we were undressing for bed, Emily sighed.

"Rose, I miss mama a lot." She said.

"I know you do, but you'll get to see her soon." I said.

And with that, we turned out the light to go to sleep.


End file.
